Spending a day at University with my daughter we are listening to a presentation about student life. She is conscientious and committed, but she worries that everything she learns won’t stay in her head and be there when she needs it. I can remember my first episode of depression soon after I’d … [Read more...] about How Learning Happens Even When You’re Stuck
Self Acceptance
How To Be Distracted
I need to write a presentation but I am finding it hard to craft the beginning. To avoid the discomfort of sitting and staring at an empty screen I go and make coffee but, as the minute's tick by, I start to feel bad about myself, about not using my time efficiently. To avoid the growing feeling … [Read more...] about How To Be Distracted
Why I Wish My Father Had Something To Say
Lying awake late I wonder why I’m not asleep. The urge to enquire soon passes with the knowledge that chasing sleep succeeds only in pushing it further away. I need music to soothe me and I scroll through the classical playlists on Spotify wishing my father was here so I could ask him what to … [Read more...] about Why I Wish My Father Had Something To Say
How To Be Honest With Yourself
On the radio, there is an interview with Polly Harvey about her score for a new production of “All About Eve”. She speaks with freedom about her art and, at that moment, I think of all the ways I have held myself back. Like love, great art relies on openness. Like love, openness can only be … [Read more...] about How To Be Honest With Yourself
Why Too Much Certainty Is Bad For You
My mother went through a stage of making too many chicken casseroles. Shortly after I’d left home I had to go back there to be fed because, as a result of Black Wednesday, my mortgage repayments had become so severe that I literally couldn’t afford to feed myself or heat the house. Each Sunday … [Read more...] about Why Too Much Certainty Is Bad For You