Waiting for a train, someone once asked me how, as a therapist, I deal with emotional disturbance in my own life. I replied that I generally have a good idea about what I need to do, but that it doesn’t necessarily mean I do it. When the human and the professional collide there is usually only one … [Read more...] about How To Take Your Own Advice
Recovery
How Emotional Muscle Memory Gets In Your Way
Listening to “Only Artists” on R4 this week Howard Goodall is describing the importance of breaking free from the “muscle memory” created through composing on the piano. Once your hands know where to go they tend to gravitate back there every time. It made so much sense when I thought about my … [Read more...] about How Emotional Muscle Memory Gets In Your Way
Why You Might Be Part Of The Problem
During a phone call with the mother of a prospective client I ask her why, if he needs help, her adult son isn’t calling me himself? No more than half an hour after the conversation I received an angry email from her complaining that I had made her feel that she was the one with the problem, … [Read more...] about Why You Might Be Part Of The Problem
Why You Need To Accept The Consequences
Trying to spruce up the elderberry vodka which has been maturing nicely in the shadows at the back of a kitchen cupboard I turn to a bottle of elderberry cordial made in the distant memory of late spring. Popping the stopper there is a very loud bang and the ceramic bottle top hurtles into the … [Read more...] about Why You Need To Accept The Consequences
Why Therapy Won’t Fix You.
I remember the first therapist I ever had. He always wore a suit and tie and his room was full of dark leather. He used a metaphor involving a painting, with me being either in the foreground or the background. I don’t remember anything else about it, apart from it not being at all helpful, but it … [Read more...] about Why Therapy Won’t Fix You.